Dark Knight Rises: Commissioner Flanders?

     There is NO WAY I'm the only one that thought this.

     Or this.  There has definitely got to be some others that thought of this.  I was laughing about this through all of the Dark Knight Rises.  It's why Ra's al Ghul hates Gotham so much.  They even made a movie about his backstory.

Batman: New Arkham City Secrets...

     As many know I've been on a Batman-rampage and just recently finished Arkham City.  Well the game makers, Rocksteady, released a statement a couple months ago that there were "3 or 4" secrets still hidden.

"Some of them we put in there that were really obscure were found within a week [like the Scarecrow code]," he said. "We didn't think anyone would ever solve that, but it only took people two days. But there are still 3 or 4 things that people haven't seen - some of them very subtle things. There's one that we had right in one of the first demos that we did that nobody has found - it's in there if you look hard enough." 

     Well, after watching the demos, there seem to be a few possibilities.  But I noticed that fellow in the above picture.  Not anything huge, but a decent thing to follow up on.   
     He's not an enemy because the guy Batman is interrogating is a Riddler informant, and they can only be interrogated if all other enemies are incapacitated.  So I was wondering if anyone else has spotted this dude or investigated it???
     Here's a 2nd pic from another demo... same area, another Riddler thug, and the same shady creeper kneeling by the car...

     So if anyone reading this blog checks this out, please let me know!  Throw a comment below or something.  I'll be keeping my eyes open and try and look for this fellow tomorrow night.
     I would also like to note my earlier post about Arkham City.  Has anyone tried to find Scarecrow on Halloween?  Specifically on that day?  He has fear toxin tanks left all over, his mask on a bridge, the barge, and secret radio signals.  There are also thugs that mention him possibly being killed or eaten by Killer Croc down in the sewers.  Maybe the Croc cameo changes to Scarecrow on Halloween?  I don't know, just a suggestion.  There is a room down in the sewers that seems FAR TOO small for Croc down there...

Dark Knight Rises: Thoughts on the Joker

     Figured I'd throw in a small pic to lighten the discussions I've been having about the Joker and the Dark Knight Rises.  I mentioned a lot of these things in older posts, tweets, and conversations with friends.  Thought I might as well make a post about it.  So here goes...
     While I am quite grateful Mr. Nolan decided to leave the character out of the movie, it would've been nice to see or hear of what happened to him.  Nothing big, but something- like the Killer Croc reference.  Just a single, simple line of dialogue and fans would love it.
     I mean- just have an inmate mention that he's just gone or something.  It is fitting that the Joker would leave the same way he arrived, without a trace.  Poof, vanished, no indications of where he would've gone.  When he was found, he had no fingerprints, no ID, nothing but "knives and lint," and so that's how he would exit the stage.  Just the knowlege that he's out there somewhere possibly waiting to wreak crazy havoc upon the world.
     If I were to have handled a nod to the Joker, it would've been something like this.  During Bane's release of all the Blackgate prisoners, have Harley Quinn in an empty cell.  With Arkham Asylum and Blackgate being loaded with inmates, it would stand to reason her character could be working at both facilities.  Just a blonde worker sitting alone in a cell.  She'd look despondent and be looking around dazed.  Perhaps have a handful of Joker cards laying around and a few of those creepy red smiles painted on the cell's wall.  Have her muttering to herself that he's gone and fumbling with his cards while sitting on his bunk.  Then continue panning by.  A continuous scene incorporated into the film.     
     Now this would only be like 30 seconds long, panning by while the other inmates are escaping.  Selina Kyle/Catwoman could've walked by and saw it.  It could've been such an easy, elegant way to handle Heath Ledger's outstanding performance without diminishing the character, while including him in a way that makes sense.

Dark Knight Rises: Bane's quite the Joker

I had to do this.  It was a joke from something I Tweeted like last fall.  Enjoy the lame innuendo humor.

Prometheus: Alien could've been a lot different...

     Hey people-  I was just thinking that Alien would've turned out a LOT different if John Hurt's character Kane did this in the Derelict Ship. 

     All he had to do was yell, "LEEROY JENKINS!" and run like hell through the ship's egg chamber.  Set off all the eggs and facehuggers come springing out galore- maybe the astronauts get away, maybe they don't.  And I have no clue how resilient the facehuggers are without food or water.  Perhaps they could survive the hostile LV-426 atmosphere? 
     I just thought this potential story could be humorous.

Citizen Thane. Mass Effect + Citizen Kane.

     I'm up to some photoshop stupidity again.  This time I combined Mass Effect and Citizen Kane together into #ClassicEffect.  I doubt this hash tag will hold on or linger, but I have a few more ideas for it.  One never knows what will catch on.  This mash up consists of Thane Krios remembering his beloved sniper rifle.  That's about it.
Sometimes I'm dumb.

Batman: Arkham City

     With all the Batman excitement I decided to finish Arkham City for PS3.  I picked it up, started it and just never got back to playing.  This is a must play for any Gamer/Batman fan.  Arkham Asylum was wonderful and filled with tons of goodies.     This installment certainly doesn't fall short either.  There are an INSANE amount of nods to characters and missions to fill out the main story, which is essentially a military controlled(well "TYGER" guards) walled off portion of Gotham is set aside to house the criminals the the Asylum from the first game couldn't due to destructive fires possibly set by the Joker.

     One thing I finally got to enjoy was the fact Mr. Freeze got to play a large role in the story.  As my personal favorite bat-villain I was overjoyed at this.  He just has a tragic and wonderful story.  His wife Nora suffered from some kind of currently incurable disease, so he cryogenically froze her to prevent the imminent death from happening.  Some bad things went down at the lab, the management tried to pull the plug and an accident occured which left Victor Fries in need of a refridgeration suit to live in sub-zero temperatures.  Now he lives out his days searching for a cure for Nora.
     Here's a screen capture of Nora and Freeze together.

     Anyway- I was completely blown away at all the Easter eggs throughout the game.  Encounters with characters like Azrael, Hush, and the time sensitive(only visitable on specific dates, being Holidays) Calender Man.  There was the Black Mask getting beaten by some thugs.  By eavesdropping on thugs there is talk of Killer Croc, which someone showed me can be encountered in game under the right conditions.

     Which leads me to my next topic- Scarecrow.  His levels in Arkham Asylum were easily some of the best moments in gaming history, so one would think they'd bring him back.  Sadly the closest thing to those levels are the Ra's al Ghul moments in this game.  I found his mask on top of some hay on a bridge, and a few of his fear gas tank in a few locations like Hush's apartment.  

     Then I found online that there are a bunch of hidden radio signals that decoded say things like, "I will return Batman" and "Fear will tear Gotham city to shreds."  Others have found that during Protocol 10 goons and henchmen bearing scarecrow like masks are found dead around Bane, Freeze, and Joker's areas.  Never alive, just there bodies.  Maybe a point could be triangulated to find a location or secret hideout for him. 
     Then of course there is Scarecrow's barge, the boat by North Gotham Docks.  A sequencer unlock is hidden in a crate that opens the boat.  Inside is a bunch of boxes with insects, strange droplets floating around, creepy flickering lights and a henchman that yells when you get close.  Nailed to a post near him is an invoice for the shipment to Scarecrow (Crane).  So what I was thinking is maybe there is a date related thing for him(ie. Calendar Man)?  Possibly Halloween only?  Maybe even a midstory requirement as well- like Killer Croc.  Croc MUST be done before leaving the sewers at one point.  What if Scarecrow is one of the *ROCKSTEADY CONFIRMED* 3 or 4 Easter eggs still not found yet???  To be done on a certain date and time in the game's story.  Would be pretty damn good.

I also found it funny that Alfred Pennyworth is voiced by a Mr. Jarvis.  Lol, butler humor.

Gotta go- Dark Knight Rises showing in a mere 8 hours. 

Dark Knight Rises: Bane's question for Gotham

     Taking a break from sketching and watching one of my all time favorite movies, I decided to add some Anchorman to The Dark Knight Rises.
     A clear reference to the famous quote, "I'm Ron Burgundy?"  It's Bane asking Gotham in his muffled speech if it's really Ron Burgundy.  He's clearly confused from huffing all that Scarecrow toxin from Batman Begins.  I mean that's gotta be some potent stuff, and he's got it pumping full blast through the mask. 
     Ra's al Ghul must have hooking him up with The League of Shadow's super-secret special stash of it.  Not the weaponized stuff, of course, just the recreational blend.

The Punisher: #DIRTYLAUNDRY

     Found an interesting fan movie of the Punisher thanks to www.comicvine.com starring Thomas Jane and a supporting appearance by Ron Pearlman. There is very adult themes, and some violence. be warned this may not be suitable for work time viewing.

      I believe these guys should be allowed to make another film. Do I see a kickstarter in their future? Probably. Marvel should be making films that apply to an adult audience. In all seriousness, the next Wolverine movie with Hugh Jackman should be an R rated film. At least a hard PG-13. The Dark Knight was handled phenominally, why can't they do that with Wolverine??? Marvel Comics what the heck? I'm sure there are tons of amazing creators that could do Wolverine justice. Like Nolan and Batman, and like the begining steps here with the Punisher. A true Punisher movie needs to be handled properly.
      Personally I would love to see a film like this done with a grainier film. Emphasize the grit and substance of the Punisher's world. Maybe only have crystal clear shots during fights when he is fully "on" in Punisher mode and gritty, grainy stuff as the mundane necessities are carried out. I don't know, it's just an idea. Even messing with colors could really do a grand job of boosting feel. Dull muted colors throughout all the slow parts, gaining momentum and color into the battles/fight scenes. It could be amazing.
          Great acting by everyone. The kid does an especially wonderful job.
      The script could use a little work. Frank Castle seems a bit off during the time he is doing laundry. Too much down time with ignoring the harassing of neighborhood people. They could've possibly cut the time up and have it occur over a few days. That bottle of Jack? Really, how did it not break? Good idea, but having it break, then having a blade may have been better. Although it would have negated the great 'punishment' scene at the end.

      Anyway, I would definitely like to see more of this type of work. It shows great promise. With great promise comes great funding. Get on it Marvel. Throw in an editor to clean up and tighten the script and you could have a damn good film on your hands. Unlike those travesties "Wolverine: X-men Origins" and "Punisher: War Zone" or the, not one, but two, yes 2!!!! awful "Ghost Rider" and "Fantastic Four" films. Oh sweet mamma's flapjack's! They were horrendous. It isn't even the actors' faults. Most of them have top notch movies, it just comes down to poor teams being assembled and a crap movie being made. Take the time, get the right people involved and then TAKE MORE TIME to make films worth watching.

Dark Knight Rises: Bane vs. Batman

     Not gonna lie, I think this is Bane's master plan.  He's trying to get Batman into the ring for some serious WWF or WWE wrestling championship match.  Maybe that thing on Bane's head is a mouthguard and ear protector combo.  Can't be getting cauliflower ear while giving Batman the beatdown of his life during Gotham's Rumble-fest 2012. 
     This ultimate showdown needs to be dramatic, not gross.  Safety first and whatnot.
     It'll probably go like this: Zap! Bam! Pow!  *Atomic leg drop* *Backbreaker* *Paralyzed Batman gets a job announcing matches and coaching until he gets better*  and finishes with... *Batman uses a Drop toe-hold into a Sharpshooter leg hold* and Bane taps out in disappointing failure.  The Heavy Weight Champion of Gotham is Batman.  
     I wonder about Bane's crazy ass mask.  Apparently it's feeding him painkillers, but I think otherwise.  Maybe it's hiding a nasty light blonde molester moustache.  A molestache?  Sounds about right.  Extra creepy.
     Or what if it's just a massive set of orthodontic headgear braces?   Hhmmm... that would explain why he is so pissed off all the time.
     On a serious note, I hope Mr. Nolan knocks this one out of the park.  Reviews are saying as much, but I'll wait until I've actually seen it for a review.  By review, I mean a bunch of random thoughts about the movie.  Super excited as it's just a few days away.
     Interestingly I wonder if they'll bring in an Azrael type character towards the end...  Doubtful, but oh well.

Prometheus: A Beautiful Mess

     Before wasting your time with a long, jumbled, and blabbery post on the movie, here's what I think David said to the Engineer.  It would explain why it got so pissed and went on a rampage.

 

     Just to start, I'll say I enjoyed the movie.  At least the visuals.  The reason I posted this with the subtitle of a beautiful mess is because I believe that's what the movie amounts to.  A wonderful visual buffet with a very poor, perhaps rushed, script.  Maybe a few editors could've fixed the Jon Spaihts and Damon Lindelof story. 
     Well, at least try to make the script into a story.  It's like the writers had a bunch of unconnected visual ideas they scribbled on to blank pages and then pasted them in random intervals into a script for an android's story of rebellion and struggle for independance against It's creator/father.  I mean most of the time people set out to write scripts/stories they know the answers to, to fulfill the questions raised- or at least lead viewers towards an answer.  This particular movie has too many problems. It probably could've been fixed if it had been postponed a year before filming.  Companies are in too much of a hurry to make a buck.

*SPOILERS AHEAD*
*RANDOM THOUGHTS ALSO AHEAD*

     The movie starts with one of the race of Engineers on a planet, assumed by many to be Earth.  This indivuidual seems to be seeding the planet by drinking some black goop out of a small container.  This wonderful black substance starts to break down the Engineer's being and spreads his DNA into the waterfall. 

     What I would like to understand is why this individual would do that?!?  Seriously, a baker doesn't bake themselves into their cakes.  What if something wasn't right, or the process didn't go as planned?  Well the the magical black goop apparently does whatever the hell it wants. (More on this later)  After it breaks down the Engineer DNA and then switches it's function to building life.  Now, I'm no scientist, but one would think that when starting to seed a planet, one would seed it with tons of varint species, all over.  Not with one type of magical DNA that will evolve over thousands of years into a smaller, weaker, and just generally lesser version of yourself... as well as all manner of plants and animals. 
     I suppose that many animals have quite similar DNA to humans.  (I've read somewhere about fruit flies and chickens being 60 % correspondant to human, cats around 90%, and chimpanzees about 97%.)
     Why wouldn't they just make smaller versions of themselves and plop them down on the planet?  Doesn't make much sense.  Which leads me to say- this is the start of a movie about poor science.  Perhaps this particular Engineer was a lone worker or maybe the equivalent of a suicide bomber.
What baker bakes himself into their cakes?  Do architects build themselves into their buildings?  NO!  Why?  Because it's stupid.  You can't fix a building when you're dead in the walls, and you can't bake any replacement cakes when you're a dead ingredient.

     Ok, with this odd beginning out of the way, I want to say that I'm super disappointed that they didn't keep the Elephantine "Space Jockey" a non-human.  It seemed so much more amazing to have a large creature that isn't a human in a technological marvel.  In fact it always reminded me of Robert E. Howard's story "Tower of the Elephant" about Conan the Barbarian's encounter with the elephantine alien Yag-Kosha.

     So the story cuts to the 2 main characters, Dr.'s/Scientists "Girl with an Alien Tattoo" Shaw and "Not Tom Hardy" Holloway, finding some old cave paintings even older than the other 10 carvings and paintings by ancient cultures that have previously been found.  Why they would get super excited about something they ALREADY know is beyond me.  These 2, Shaw and Holloway, have already found all these unconnected cultures had pictures of the same thing- people essentially worshipping a giant humanoid gesturing to a group of planets/stars.  Which to me would mean we've been visited A BUNCH OF TIMES and if we waited a while longer they would come back again.

    Shaw has an immense faith because her father told her something as a child and she CHOOSES what to believe.  Sounds like science to me.  I'm going to CHOOSE to believe in what I want and not bother to ask any questions, and subsequently screw everything over in the end.  IDIOT! 
Let's just CHOOSE to ignore all the evidence that looks negative and assume we got an invite to a party!  Yay! 
     Fifield, the only outright Nay sayer in the whole Prometheus' crew asks why, and niether Shaw nor Holloway can answer.  They just resort to the "because" mentality.  Not very scientific.  Not very mature either.
     In all reality, the picture could be a reprimand or warning.  Something along the lines of, "Hey humanity, this is daddy's dangerous stuff, KEEP OUT!" 
     So, really choosing to believe one thing with something akin to children's drawings makes me wonder, what the hell kind of Dr.s are these main characters anyway???  Do they just hand out PH.D.s to anyone that graduated high school in the future?  I'd say that "No Child Left Behind" really held back future intellect.
     BALH BLAH BLAH  this is getting too long, so I'll shorten the rest.

     It also strikes me as highly preposterous that of the two people that get lost in the cave complex, one of them is a geologist.  He also has a 3 dimensional map of the place.  How many cameras do we have nowadays that just send pictures to be printed without having them on a viewscreen?

     Problems with the Black Goo Substance.  1) It disintegrates the Engineer at the beginning after being ingested, but takes forever to have an effect on  Holloway.  2) After an infected Holloway impregnates Shaw, she C-section birthes a squid baby.  3) Fifield is splattered with it and turns into a contortionist/acrobatic/zombie/gymnast/killer.  4)Etc.  Seriously, where's the continuity?  Have it do one thing, not a bunch of random crap "that looks cool."  That's dumb.
     If it broke down the Engineer to eventually evolve into people, shouldn't it be doing that to everything living it contacts?  Especially since we all come from the same source according to the opener of the movie.

     After Shaw C-sections herself and loads up on drugs she becomes an olympian champ.  Nonstop sprinting for the rest of the film.  Must've been some good stuff in those syringes.

    When David brings Weyland to visit the Engineer I had to ask a quetion that bugged me a LOT.  If Weyland is so sure his creation had no soul, and his subsequent contemptuous treatment of David, what would make him think the Engineers would think any better of us?  From the film all I could gather is they made humans(at least 1, but maybe a few more Engineers.  Maybe "Prometheus" stole the black goo and made us, I don't know) Then they spent a considerable amount of effort to create an unstable product(Black goo), and mass produce it in a secret military installation, send out invites, then seek to destroy their creations.  Are humans that dangerous?  Were we a by product?  A failed military bioweapon?
     If Weyland can put people into a hypersleep, why couldn't he just wait out the time until we've designed a youth drug, replacement bodies, or mind transferance? 
     Also, with all the technological might of the Engineer empire, why would they start their ships with a damn flute?  I could see a whistled tune or sound/vocal commands, but a FLUTE?!?!?!?

     At the end after the Squidbaby magically grew, locked in a room without any sustenance and going 100% undetected, into a Squid giant and impregnated the Engineer.  It sprouted a chest bursting alien-esque creature.  A part that many of my friends were anticipating.  My reply to this is at least 1 of the Engineers had to know what was going to happen.  Which means the Black goo should have predictable qualities.  How would they know?  Glad you asked- when they room with the ridiculous giant Engineer head was opened the mural had a GIANT ALIEN QUEEN PAINTED ON IT!
     Shaw and David after hijacking another Engineer ship decide to go on a wonderful quest: Engineer homeworld!  Are you friggin' serious?  A single Engineer ripped one of their heads off and almost killed the other.  How well do they expect to fare against a vast number of them?  Absurd.  They should at least head back to Earth for some kind of reinforcements, reverse engineer some of the tech, maybe get some smarter crew members that CHOOSE not be be complete idiots, and then head out.
     Ugh.  I'm sure I've missed a bunch of things, and forgotten even more.  It's been like a month since I saw and discussed it with friends.  So if you've managed to read this far, thank you.

Well at least the movie sparked a ton of conversation.  Makes me wonder how long it will take James Cameron to make a better sequel.  It'll be called Epimetheus.  Which is more appropriate because there wasn't a lot of Prometheus(forethought) in this film.

Zoolander Effect part 2

I just couldn't help but make one more image for the Zoolander Effect.
Mass Effect + Zoolander = Zoolander Effect.
Billy Zane is a cool dude, Thane is a cool dude.  It just seemed fitting.
And it fit with the Zane/Thane sounds, so lucky me.

Zoolander Effect

Zoolander + Mass Effect = Zoolander Effect.
I made this pic because a fellow on Twitter put an idea in my mind.  The combination of Zoolander and Mass Effect. 
I couldn't help but think of various scenes from both game and movie in an amazing crossover. 
Like Garrus/Hansel telling Shepard Zoolander that he should "listen to his friend Billy Thane, he's a cool dude."  Or that the Illusive Mugatu invented the Piano-key Shepard, an exclusive skin for the Shepard character.

The scene with Shepard Zoolander and his father... Father- "I just thank the Lord she didn't live to see her son as a Gethmaid." And Shep would reply, "Geth-MAN! *girly cough*... geth-man."

Or how about Shepard Zoolander and Miranda on the Normandy - "Uh Earth to Miranda, I was at a day spa. Day, D-A-I-Y-E, okay?"-Shepard Zoolander

And the other Twitter guy posted about Alenko/Meekus and Jacob/Brint dying in a freak gasoline fight accident.

Anyway, sorry to subject readers to this wonderful stupidity.  Sometimes I think of really dumb things. 

Lord of the Rings derpiness.

I made this as a break from some adds/coupons.  Theoden at Helm's Deep being a general idiot and overly dramatic.